I’m past the halfway mark for The Last Goddess! Based on the calculations of at least five different Excel sheets, this beast should be done by mid-November. Thanks to my two idiot weirdos (sorry, TLG’s protagonists), my search histories have been riddled with a number of wtf? queries of late.
In no particular order, here are the top 15 weird-ass questions I’ve lobbed at the internet so this novel can pretend to be “authentic” and “accurate.” Of course, half of the fun of this is not telling you the context.
- What does urine taste like (answer: sour but also salty?!)
- Videos of grease fires (unfortunately for me, most of these were about putting out the fire)
- Videos of people setting fire to olive oil (thank you, farmer dude, for your 10 minute explanatory video on this!)
- How to impale someone (silly me for thinking this happens only vertically!)
- Idioms that contain the word “colossus” (sadly our culture has let me down in this regard)
- Exactly how chewy are chicory leaves? (side note: chicory makes for a fabulous coffee-substitute if you’re sensitive to caffeine)
- Commonly confused toxic berries (I had to include this in the book after binging a bunch of Black Forager’s “poison or snack” videos)
- Flagellant processions (research verdict: nope, nope, nope, we’re not including that!)
- Symptoms of street drug withdrawals, leprosy, & the Black Death (I get bonus stars for diving into the image search results, right?)
- Doofy medieval paintings of greyhounds (see below for the crowning jewel of doofy greyhounds)
- Every type of hard meat that existed in the 14th century (did I need to know this? yes, absolutely; no regrets)
- Vulgar Roman swears (sophist, lecher, and dog-faced were a few of my favs)
- Were restaurants a thing in 1397? (tbh, glad I decided to look this up)
- Is there a verb for yelling a whisper? (answer: hiss, growl, mutter…so, no)
- Which flowers look like lady bits? (honestly, it’s weird how many there are)
Curious, can you top these? Let me know!